Here's Your O.R.G.Y.

1969, possibly first edition, from Berkley Medallion
Ted Mark
Here's Your O.R.G.Y.
Original price 75 cents, bought used for unknown
Worn paperback
C+

One of a series of 15 books that ran from 1965 to 1981, this is a James Bond parody that includes the cocky (in all senses) Steve Victor, the founder of the title group, Organization for the Rational Guidance of Youth, which does hands-(and more)-on sex research; his more-Jewish-than-actual-Jews mother; a search for five willing women of various nationalities and types to join a harem; punny names like "Di Arrea, the Brazilian toilet manufacturer" and his lesbian "pimp" Nina Procura ; sort of current events, including the Tet Offensive and the '68 Chicago Convention; and jokes about abortion and incestuous necrophilia. 

As part of his recruitment for the harem, Steve seduces various candidates, and a few other women.  Meanwhile, his mama wants to lance the boil on his bottom, which she does in the last chapter, while he's having sex!!  He also has sex in the sand with an Israeli soldier (female of course, Steve doesn't swing the other way, Baby), interrupted by a camel shitting on them!!  Not all of the sex is that disgusting, but it is often weird. 

My ex-husband and I bought this book when we were about 17 and thought it was ridiculous.  We also speculated that it was written by two (or more) people, because Steve Victor and Ted Mark are all first names.  The book is copyright by Ted Gottfried, who it turns out is one person that later wrote textbooks for children on controversial subjects, including pornography.  There is a schizophrenic nature to the book.  To take the Convention sequence as an example, part of it is about trying to get a busty, natural blonde hippie for the harem, but it's also a social document that describes what it was like to be on the spot, including getting tear-gassed.  And there's a sympathetic portrayal of Dick Gregory and his very pregnant wife Lillian.  So one minute it's realism, and then the next Steve is going down on a hippie girl in her sleeping bag (as part of the process of verifying her blondeness) but losing her to Cass Nova, who's simultaneously blowing in her ear.

There are six teams of plumbing magnates and their recruiters, trying to track down not only the hippie girl and the sabra soldier Naomi Ben Shik-Zah, but an unhappily married French skin-diving aristocrat, a red-headed Danish virgin, and a Pygmy princess.  (Steve's princess has "a Ph.D. in psychology from Oxford University, yet!")  The other American team has Cass Nova working for right-winger Larry Rustwater.  (Gee, I wonder who that could be a parody of?)

Is this a good book?  Of course not.  Is it entertaining?  Yeah, in its own twisted way, it is.  It's bound to offend just about anyone and I certainly wouldn't recommend it to all my friends, but a few might dig it.  I can't see going looking for the rest of the series, except for maybe the previous book, "Come Be My O.R.G.Y., if you're intrigued enough to spring six bits for a complete telling of the entralling details."  It apparently contains a time machine.  Click here for more details:

http://salmongutter.blogspot.com/2008/05/paperback-95-come-be-my-orgy-ted-mark.html